Improv Everywhere

My friend Sarah directed me to this website. I've had some good laughs.

http://improveverywhere.com/

(My judgment: funnier than Peter Funt or Ashton Kutcher.)

Security

When I was younger, I was fearful of other people because I cared so much about what they thought of me. Today, not much has changed. It's a constant battle for approval from others. I want people to like me and understand me. I remember that one time I wanted so badly to ask one of my friends over to spend the night, but because she was cooler than me, I couldn't bring myself to do it. So naturally, I asked my mom to do it for me. As my mom stood there talking to my friend and her mom, I almost ripped a hole in my shirt from nervousness. In high school and college, I would write down questions and have a classmate ask the teacher for me. I'm always nervous about saying something stupid, mainly because it will reflect badly on me. And... yeah. I still call my mom so she can help me rehearse what I should say to people over the phone.

It’s not only that I care far too much about what other people think, it’s also that I'm trying to find my security in something other than Christ.

I'm plagued with this insecurity. But for some reason God chooses to call me his child, his servant, and his friend. What's ridiculous about this is that he didn't only invite me, an outsider, into his palace gates to join him for a meal and then throw me back out -- just so that he could up his status as King. Instead, he has come out to the street, he has picked me up, bathed me, clothed me, given me a new name, and he feeds me daily. That alone is cause enough to be eternally grateful. But he doesn't stop there. He gives me an inheritance that can't be taken away from me...even from the most powerful in the world. And even better (or perhaps worse, in the most glorious sense), He takes all my shame away and puts it on himself.

While I'm constantly deflecting shame away from me, Christ became a target for all the disgrace that rightly belongs to me -- all that shame that should be on my permanent record.

I have all the approval I should ever want secured in the work of Jesus on my behalf, all the intimacy I should ever need secured in my relationship – my friendship – with the Almighty. Good gracious, how can I ignore it?

Bitter and Sweet, by John Newton

Once in a while I like reading some of John Newton's letters. I find some of them on the website, "Fire and Ice: Puritan and Reformed Writings." There's other good stuff there, too. Like this poem -- which expresses the tension I feel day in and day out as I go through life in a fallen world. I'm still not sure what it means to both live in this tension and also in the reality of grace as I'm constantly looking for relief from frustration and disappointments. The poem teaches me a little about what it looks like to pray in the midst of this tension: "Often Lord, repeat your grace."

1 Kindle, Saviour, in my heart,
A flame of love divine;
Hear, for mine I trust thou art,
And sure I would be thine;
If my soul has felt thy grace,
If to me thy name is known;
Why should trifles fill the place
Due to thyself alone?

2 'Tis a strange mysterious life
I live from day to day;
Light and darkness, peace and strife,
Bear an alternate sway:
When I think the battle won,
I have to fight it o'er again;
When I say I'm overthrown,
Relief I soon obtain.

3 Often at the mercy-seat,
While calling on thy name,
Swarms of evil thoughts I meet,
Which fill my soul with shame.
Agitated in my mind,
Like a feather in the air,
Can I thus a blessing find?
My soul, can this be pray'r?

4 But when Christ, my Lord and Friend,
Is pleas'd to show his pow'r
All at once my troubles end,
And I've a golden hour;
Then I see his smiling face,
Feel the pledge of joys to come:
Often, Lord, repeat this grace
Till thou shalt call me home.

Show me love

Is our society tolerant of a toxic syndrome called tolerance?

Love is something more stern and splendid than mere kindness.
-C.S. Lewis

Rejoice, then rest

I was reading Philippians 4, and was struck by something Paul says. He urges the Philippians to rejoice in the Lord, and "then the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." Then he says later in verses 8 and 9 to focus on the things of the Lord and "the God of peace will be with you."

Though I've read these verses lots before, I've never truly noticed the arrangement of Paul's words. He talks experiencing the peace of God in the context of rejoicing/enjoying the things God has for us. It seems backwards -- like I should only be able to rejoice once I feel a certain amount of peace or calm in my life. And I suppose that is true at times. But it's also a glorious and difficult truth about the Christian life that we are called to rejoice even in our pain.

"Joy is something we cannot produce ourselves; it is a fruit of the Holy Spirit" ("Thru the Bible" commentary, McGee). Joy is a gift from the Holy Spirit, and peace comes from our Lord -- the Prince of Peace. And we can pray for these things, and God supplies us with these things.

McGee writes about it like this: "Notice that we entered this passage in anxiety, with worry, and we come out of the passage with peace. Between the two was prayer. Have things changed? Not really. The storm may still be raging, the waves still rolling high, the thunder still resounding. Although the storm has not abated, something has happened in the individual. Something has happened to the human soul and the human mind. In our anxiety we want God to change everything around us. 'Give us this.' 'Don't let this happen." "Open up this door.' We should be praying, "Oh, God, change me.' Prayer is the secret of power."

A hymn

O heart bereaved and lonely,
Whose brightest dreams have fled
Whose hopes like summer roses,
Are withered crushed and dead
Though link by link be broken,
And tears unseen may fall
Look up amid thy sorrow,
To Him who knows it all

O cling to thy Redeemer,
Thy Savior, Brother, Friend
Believe and trust His promise,
To keep you till the end
O watch and wait with patience,
And question all you will
His arms of love and mercy,
Are round about thee still

Look up, the clouds are breaking,
The storm will soon be o'er
And thou shall reach the haven,
Where sorrows are no more
Look up, be not discouraged;
Trust on, whate'er befall
Remember, O remember,
Thy Savior knows it all